10 Things We're Looking Forward to Now That the Large Hadron Collider Is Running

From Woot.com:

10 Things We're Looking Forward To Now That The Large Hadron Collider Is Running

by Scott Lydon Wednesday September 10, 2008 4:15 PM

Since the total destruction of the planet is apparently off the table...

1. Suddenly much harder to get particle beams insured
2. Brief, sudden portal to empty dimension where we can dump all those Sansas
3. The return of that battleship we lost in the Philadelphia Experiment
4. Last minute lawsuit from Fox that claims they have rights to make a Hadron Collider and they just now noticed it
5. Crazed Doctor McCoy falls through, meets a woman, has to watch her die to stop the Nazis
6. "Hadron" replaces "Caden" as the hot new name for baby boys
7. All Swiss chocolate now tastes a little strange but no one knows why
8. New particle discovered, named after Tails from Sonic the Hedgehog
9. Fred Phelps opens godhatesbosons.com
10. Buyer’s remorse from the scientists as they realize that the Extra Large Hadron Collider was only thirty nine cents more